It looks like I am starting to be somatophobic. I don’t feel my body like it is the great part of me. I am turning into the source from which I draw all the potential creative charge. I see my body through the prism of its bondage with the temporal. Whatever happens, it always stays in mind. The wounds heal but memories stay stamped into the mind. The subject remains what it is no matter what. These are supplementary doubles (mind – body), and one would say that there is no dual identity.
The critical point of Descartes thought is that it is possible to achieve certainty of existence through awareness. To this fact Spinoza’s monism rebels. Why would the body be lower in value? And Nietzsche with his sense affirmation? The body is not all that it seems, it is part of the subject defined as “I”. While the spirit transcends the sphere of the material, the body remains in it, defines it and even, in some way, postulates the field of the identity. There is a need for a definition of a homogeneous area in which all sorts of body types appear. The body is in wholeness and is an equally important part of the unity of the spirit or the mind.
I drowned all my potentials. Those are the days when I am swimming in the pool of inspiration. I derive the waves of animus from the Mind of the great potential. The lake is looking very quiet, anchored in its own silence. A storm is brewing. Brainstorm. Semi-hallucinations occur to me to imply stagnation. I’m calm because I know that after that comes the blast of motivation. The sparks of creative energy are sparkling in the water. In the eyes, I see the reflection of the self. Dual self. Me and the other guy who I hardly know. The second identity doesn’t seem tight. It looks like my alter ego is pretty liable.
All around I see and feel the waves coming up. They look like idiosyncratic magic. The efforts disappear under the influence of motivation. They are disappearing and turning into something magical. The waves surround me from all sides. I am hiding in a safe place. Behind alone. In the background. Even so I am not the frontal type, yet I am the most notable one. I’m not trying to move on because I do not know what waves can do, and because sometimes I am anxious about their power. I don’t know who is strong enough. I don’t know which part of “I” is able to fight with their potential.
~ Zorica ~